Tip for tackling the commute

People say that in London we walk faster than anywhere else on the globe. A fast-paced lifestyle coupled with a disastrously unreliable London Transport Network projects an image of London’s rush hour like a film on fast forward. Armed with briefcases and oversized umbrellas, it is easy to envisage a brigade of city workers marching speedily through stations and along platforms, intent on preserving their imperative punctuality. Alas, our stereotypical fantasy is far from the truth. Instead, the reality I frustratingly encounter when stepping off the train is a slow-moving wall of snail-paced pedestrians, sauntering obliviously ahead while I inwardly scream at them for time-wasting. It may be insensitive and pointless to rant about an irritation that stems partly from jealousy of those leisurely idlers around us, who aren’t late, stressed out and panicky. But if you happen to be all three of the above, being faced with futile time delay can seem like the most maddening thing on earth.
Until now, the only solution that came to mind was to launch desperately into the crowd, only to be battered about like an injured moth in a gale. If you can identify with this fruitless effort, the infuriating inefficiency of the method probably sums it up. Just why exactly do groups of people insist on walking in a horizontal line? If ever there was a time to get angry about nothing, rush hour is it. However, there is an answer. Over the past few weeks, careful observation has finally revealed to me the tactical commuter’s biggest secret. See, the trick is to pick out someone decisive and fast in the crowd who’s making better headway than you, and walk directly in their wake. It may sound creepy at first, but attaching yourself to an already made pathway is surprisingly effective at stress-relief AND time saving. You may be thinking that this resembles an advert for stalking, as what I’m essentially advising is to start following a stranger, but if it’s to save you from the reckless free-for-all of a thousand dissecting paths it might just be worth it. Mind you stick close on his tail though, or the throng of snails will do their best to separate you from your selected guide. My only question is: how rife is this phenomenon? Is it merely the enlightened minority or just one of those things nobody ever admits?