Who killed Amanda Palmer? The name of her solo album introduced with a bang her striking production at Koko, Camden last night, a captivating set from start to finish. Being dramatically conveyed by human props about the stage owing to an unfortunate broken foot only highlighted the success of her singular dominance, detached from her usual Dresden Dolls counterpart. As she energetically wrought a night of alternative music with a cabaret twist from the centrepiece keyboard, a thoroughly involved audience cheered raucously along despite it being barely 9pm. If it was audience enthusiam that made this performance, Palmer could only thank her close friend and show opener; Jason Webley, who single-handedly induced an entire audience to spin around twelve times with their fingers in the air, as a quick-fix to soberness. This hero accordianist even created his own choir by dividing the audience and encouraging a war of sound between the two halves.
It was while surveying the dizzy spinning rabble from a balcony above that I realised that by taking my glasses off I could achieve the same inebriated effect. If dizziness was a factor of being drunk, (a state I was yet to achieve) then so was blurred vision - a revelation I felt excitedly compelled to communicate with my newly found champions. Such an incentive would be received gladly by the entertainers, we were soon to learn, as buckets inviting public opinion (and tips) circulated Koko's exit. The fact that Webley's home address is even detailed on the back of his album cover urging fans to "send me stuff" highlights the emphasis placed on audience interaction. I was amazed by the sheer entertainment value infused into the concert: the performers' effort seemed to reach beyond their existing fans to capture new ones.
Palmer's final dynamic encore demonstrates her dedication to give it her all to the gig's absolute conclusion. The show's consistent parasol motif transforms ironically into a mocked rendition of Rhianna's "Umbrella" complete with the comedy of arse shaking and stripping off. Finishing with a caricature representing everything her own individual sound is not, we are reminded of the value of this unique act, a satisfaction we'd wonder at longer if it wasn't for growing anticipation of the eternal toilet queue we are about to be faced with. And thus marks the sign of a successful night, - no one present has wanted to miss a minute of it.
Saturday, 11 October 2008
Friday, 3 October 2008
Newsround: bringing some optimism to the news!
What's your favourite news broadcast? Is it the legitimately satisfying BBC news perhaps? Or maybe you're a conventional rebel and enjoy the illusion of pushing boundaries with a bit of Channel 4 news? If watching ITV entertains you, then no doubt you'll prefer ITV news' stagnant approach, deceptively akin to the BBC yet sluggish and easier on the eye. I'll tell you what's even easier on the eye if you'll permit me to dismiss any viewers of five news or even sky news as frauds. My suggestion may seek to diminish our perspective on the gory glory of reality even further, but seriously - have you ever watched Newsround?
There seems to be an indulgent irony about hearing world events spelt out to you in layman's terms, and the persistent "oh dear" attitude to the continual death and destruction reports is a reassuringly optimistic advance on our grim daily news dose. Admittedly there is an obvious lack of economics, politics and that foreboding finality; the weather - yet these supplements only feed the cynicism running through our veins. Are we deluding ourselves that being well-informed about the world makes us intelligent voters?
It's a shame that the overriding perception of the world is one seeking to destroy all hope; the fleeting relief enjoyed by those sick of the mature layout know that Newsround fills that void for a reason. Lets face it, children of today don't watch it - so why has it survived this long if not to cater for those who aren't bent on sobering their mood? Even if it's just an apparetif to harsh reality, give kids' news a chance why don't you?
There seems to be an indulgent irony about hearing world events spelt out to you in layman's terms, and the persistent "oh dear" attitude to the continual death and destruction reports is a reassuringly optimistic advance on our grim daily news dose. Admittedly there is an obvious lack of economics, politics and that foreboding finality; the weather - yet these supplements only feed the cynicism running through our veins. Are we deluding ourselves that being well-informed about the world makes us intelligent voters?
It's a shame that the overriding perception of the world is one seeking to destroy all hope; the fleeting relief enjoyed by those sick of the mature layout know that Newsround fills that void for a reason. Lets face it, children of today don't watch it - so why has it survived this long if not to cater for those who aren't bent on sobering their mood? Even if it's just an apparetif to harsh reality, give kids' news a chance why don't you?
Monday, 29 September 2008
Free education anyone? You only pay for the bit of paper.
Monday monday. First day back at University today for me, frighteningly the beginning of my third and final year. Despite being accustomed to the sights and scenes of campus life, it was the mistaken overhearing of a first year's conversation earlier that reminded me of the following ludicrous aspect of going to University. See, they don't take registers whenever you go to lectures or seminars. You don't even have to present I.D. when entering any of the buildings, and the entire campus is employed legitimately as an array of public footpaths.
Personally I'm finding it bitterly ironic as the deteriorating bank statements roll in, that the amount of cash borrowed from the Government in no way equates to what appears to me to be free education. But of course, if anyone actually wanted to learn without having a bit of paper to prove it then our newest facade of democracy would surely jump at the chance of implementing control methods. No security yet, so what I sadly acknowledge must be the ever-rising hypocrisy of what it is to be recognised as an intelligent human being. No not while systems manipulate this existence will our real geniuses flourish. I can't present an alternative, but it's a fact - if you're poor you're less likely to go to University, and in our future Generation X there are thousands not taking the chance to reach their capacities and realise their potential.
Perhaps I'm naive to think that even a moderate amount of people have any sort of lust for learning in an age where we waste our time watching adverts and sitting on our arses nurturing self-obsession. Our sap-infused popular culture we have inherited rapidly from the U.S. replacing the actuality of life with an illusory virtual world where commercialisation rules. Of course I include myself in this condemnation of modernity, it being my own culpability as part of such brain-numbing normality that provokes me to this outburst. It doesn't quite feel right, there's no room for fitting in when our societal roles are pre-allocated by class and context. Yet despite this great methodologically constructed world, has anyone noticed that the education system has failed a significant proportion of our society? In relation to my starting point, there's some unnoticed free words of the wise going spare in Brum.
Personally I'm finding it bitterly ironic as the deteriorating bank statements roll in, that the amount of cash borrowed from the Government in no way equates to what appears to me to be free education. But of course, if anyone actually wanted to learn without having a bit of paper to prove it then our newest facade of democracy would surely jump at the chance of implementing control methods. No security yet, so what I sadly acknowledge must be the ever-rising hypocrisy of what it is to be recognised as an intelligent human being. No not while systems manipulate this existence will our real geniuses flourish. I can't present an alternative, but it's a fact - if you're poor you're less likely to go to University, and in our future Generation X there are thousands not taking the chance to reach their capacities and realise their potential.
Perhaps I'm naive to think that even a moderate amount of people have any sort of lust for learning in an age where we waste our time watching adverts and sitting on our arses nurturing self-obsession. Our sap-infused popular culture we have inherited rapidly from the U.S. replacing the actuality of life with an illusory virtual world where commercialisation rules. Of course I include myself in this condemnation of modernity, it being my own culpability as part of such brain-numbing normality that provokes me to this outburst. It doesn't quite feel right, there's no room for fitting in when our societal roles are pre-allocated by class and context. Yet despite this great methodologically constructed world, has anyone noticed that the education system has failed a significant proportion of our society? In relation to my starting point, there's some unnoticed free words of the wise going spare in Brum.
Wednesday, 24 September 2008
Out of date? It's not too late. Best before? It's not the law.
What do you think folks? The "best before" date on food is only a guideline isn't it, not a religion? If the tuna pasta claims to be BEST before the date shown, then I have always believed that it'll still be pretty damn good a few days later, even if not the best it could have been. The incontrovertible "use by" date is intimidatingly less ambiguous however, which always makes me a little uneasy when daring to trust my own instincts at dinner time. The ominous sentence fragment anticipates the threat of "or else..." challenging me to bow to the fridge-guardians' authority.
Well hang on just a cotton picking second here, forgive me for taking affront at so trivial a matter, but somehow there's an edge of condescension to those bold two words "use by". In a recently long-forgotten world, food didn't come from tesco and it was up to us to decide what was edible. Surely we can't be losing such crucial judgement down to food standards fear-mongering. As a student let me advise you that eating around the mould does you no harm, and staleness merely adds to the texture. I ate a week-old lasagne with relish yesterday to no ill effect, and am impatiently considering that a more careful person may have thrown such perfectly good food away. I suppose it's no remarkable feat considering most microwave meals could survive a nuclear war, yet I would urge you all - if it doesn't smell too bad at least submit to a taste. Maybe you can't trust a reckless youth, but surely you can trust yourselves?
Well hang on just a cotton picking second here, forgive me for taking affront at so trivial a matter, but somehow there's an edge of condescension to those bold two words "use by". In a recently long-forgotten world, food didn't come from tesco and it was up to us to decide what was edible. Surely we can't be losing such crucial judgement down to food standards fear-mongering. As a student let me advise you that eating around the mould does you no harm, and staleness merely adds to the texture. I ate a week-old lasagne with relish yesterday to no ill effect, and am impatiently considering that a more careful person may have thrown such perfectly good food away. I suppose it's no remarkable feat considering most microwave meals could survive a nuclear war, yet I would urge you all - if it doesn't smell too bad at least submit to a taste. Maybe you can't trust a reckless youth, but surely you can trust yourselves?
Tuesday, 23 September 2008
Religion: ruled by fear or are we all going to Hell?
Today somebody asked me how I stood on religion. Not to thrust pamphlets into my hand or tell me I'm going to Hell but actually for the sake of philosophy and conversation. Although I'd always have said I was opinionated on the subject, I realised I hadn't thought about it in a while, and after thinking about it for a bit I came up with the following reply:
I just can't quite believe that mainstream organised religion is the answer to the supposed miracle of life. Instead, the predominant beliefs being forced down my throat sound delusional, and seem strikingly characteristic of the way the human mind works in more ways than one. It's uncanny. The way we need to idolise a leader as if escaping responsibility for our own lives saddens my sense of independence. Take Christianity for example - the bible is full of gory death, torture and punishment, yet it is humankind whose preoccupation with death makes it the worst thing in the world we can think of. It is the inevitable punishment: we are promised salvation on the one hand, but eternal damnation on the next, only serving to exacerbate our fear of death and confirming a second human characteristic: the fact that people enjoy suffering. I'm convinced of it. We impose restrictions on our own instincts - everything we enjoy in life we deprive ourselves in the attempt to convince ourselves we have control. Hence the irony of love, which brings us a contradiction of pain and joy. Even sex, our own method of continuing survival has been smothered in the social norms caught up in our warped beliefs. We have invented sin, and why? Is it so we can revel in the heightened sense of drama infusing life with meaning and satisfying the ego? Or so we can claim control over how we live, refusing to acknowledge the power of probability and chance. Those two heroes would surely make fine gods, yet our need to see the human face reflected back at us as an assurance that we are here for a reason rules non-entities out. How do we claim to have any concept of eternity when even the age of the universe is beyond our wildest dreams?
I just can't quite believe that mainstream organised religion is the answer to the supposed miracle of life. Instead, the predominant beliefs being forced down my throat sound delusional, and seem strikingly characteristic of the way the human mind works in more ways than one. It's uncanny. The way we need to idolise a leader as if escaping responsibility for our own lives saddens my sense of independence. Take Christianity for example - the bible is full of gory death, torture and punishment, yet it is humankind whose preoccupation with death makes it the worst thing in the world we can think of. It is the inevitable punishment: we are promised salvation on the one hand, but eternal damnation on the next, only serving to exacerbate our fear of death and confirming a second human characteristic: the fact that people enjoy suffering. I'm convinced of it. We impose restrictions on our own instincts - everything we enjoy in life we deprive ourselves in the attempt to convince ourselves we have control. Hence the irony of love, which brings us a contradiction of pain and joy. Even sex, our own method of continuing survival has been smothered in the social norms caught up in our warped beliefs. We have invented sin, and why? Is it so we can revel in the heightened sense of drama infusing life with meaning and satisfying the ego? Or so we can claim control over how we live, refusing to acknowledge the power of probability and chance. Those two heroes would surely make fine gods, yet our need to see the human face reflected back at us as an assurance that we are here for a reason rules non-entities out. How do we claim to have any concept of eternity when even the age of the universe is beyond our wildest dreams?
Monday, 22 September 2008
The morning after the night before.
Dreaming of water again. Only as I wake up thirsty do I realise my body's trying to tell me something, but as usual my first thoughts are chiefly preoccupied with where am I and how did I get here? Another typical evening at the pub last night, but I'm only fairly sure of that thanks to the nation's ever-increasing tendency to binge-drink. If only I could remember past this sketchy outline! Such a shame that it seems to be the only thing we know how to do as far as the rest of Europe's concerned. If the brawling shouting swaying mob I've accustomed to being a part of is anything to go by, it's hardly our striking tolerance for drink that makes us kings. And as a groggy consciousness finally resumes, albeit with startling blanks, the question on everybody's lips (besides the vomit) is - was it worth it?
At this precise moment in time I'm inclined towards the negative. What a surprise. But why oh why will I forget that before next weekend comes whizzing around with all its fake promises of shining fun and inebriated glory? There must be something about alcohol that makes our abuse of it justifiable - after all it is Britain's favourite pastime. Getting drunk is fun, isn't it? I mean that's indisputable - why else would we flock to these alcoholic establishments in our millions? All I'm starting to question is, if you can't remember it, how do you know it was the best night of your life? I suspect there'll be more on the topic, especially if these day-long hangovers persist.
At this precise moment in time I'm inclined towards the negative. What a surprise. But why oh why will I forget that before next weekend comes whizzing around with all its fake promises of shining fun and inebriated glory? There must be something about alcohol that makes our abuse of it justifiable - after all it is Britain's favourite pastime. Getting drunk is fun, isn't it? I mean that's indisputable - why else would we flock to these alcoholic establishments in our millions? All I'm starting to question is, if you can't remember it, how do you know it was the best night of your life? I suspect there'll be more on the topic, especially if these day-long hangovers persist.
Wednesday, 17 September 2008
A day at the office.
Wednesday. Proudly marking the halfway point of the working week, it inspires hope in us all - after lunch it's practically the weekend. It must be the office that's responsible for our ironic optimism, driving us to wish away precious minutes of our lives. Recent news has deemed those working in I.T. to be the most miserable people in the country - maybe computers are somehow draining our life force? It may be a desperate attempt at avoiding responsibilty for our own boredom, but such illogical thinking must be a sure-fire symptom of office cabin fever.
Yet the office also provides us with a sanctuary from reality. Safe from the wind and rain, the same things happen day after day in a predictable merry-go-round of clock-watching. In a way it's all quite comforting - the intermittent clicks and whirrs of the fax machine, the hum of the monitors. Even the gentle tapping of keys complements the polite yet patronising background murmur.
For some one facing a full in-tray to say the least as my final University year looms, saying goodbye to a comfortable summer job provokes a twinge of apprehension. So what is wrong with me? I should be longing to escape this monotony - just a week ago I'm sure I was. Judging by the thousands of office hermits wishing they did something different each day, it's clear that the nature of the office as a refuge is preventing us from following our dreams. It's easy, not too badly paid and we know what we're doing. But it's this relentless circular existence that's holding us back - does anyone realise it in the deja vu of the everyday? Blink and you've lost twenty years.
Yet the office also provides us with a sanctuary from reality. Safe from the wind and rain, the same things happen day after day in a predictable merry-go-round of clock-watching. In a way it's all quite comforting - the intermittent clicks and whirrs of the fax machine, the hum of the monitors. Even the gentle tapping of keys complements the polite yet patronising background murmur.
For some one facing a full in-tray to say the least as my final University year looms, saying goodbye to a comfortable summer job provokes a twinge of apprehension. So what is wrong with me? I should be longing to escape this monotony - just a week ago I'm sure I was. Judging by the thousands of office hermits wishing they did something different each day, it's clear that the nature of the office as a refuge is preventing us from following our dreams. It's easy, not too badly paid and we know what we're doing. But it's this relentless circular existence that's holding us back - does anyone realise it in the deja vu of the everyday? Blink and you've lost twenty years.
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